26th birthday.

Lovely.

So thank you, all. For the wishes and for the deliveries.

Be better.

Be a better person.

Be a better friend.

Be a better partner.

Be a better teammate.

Be a better son/daughter.

Be a better sibling.

Be a better grandchild.

Be better at keeping in touch.

Be better at taking care of our own body.

Be better emotionally.

Be a better forgiver.

Because by being better -- it's enough.

Words of Affirmation.

"I really do feel like you don't really deserve me because I am broken and I don't know if I'm able to love again but you're there for me no matter what. You deserve the best version of me and I wanna give you that. You made me wanna be in love again. You gave me hope. I love you."

"It is a pleasure to know you. I'm actually happy to have you. I'm very lucky to be with you. I know your stories, your past including your concerns. I know how your mind works at times. I also know that I genuinely wanna be there for you and you have to know that I'm not going anywhere. I deserve you, your worst and your best. You deserve me too. Of course I want you to be fine always - but when you feel down at times; it's okay love, it's okay. I got you and you got me. You read this back when you feel uncertain. I love you."

Kalau kisah.

Kalau kisah, tunjuk.
Kalau kisah, jangan risau.
Kalau kisah, jujur.
Kalau kisah, put in effort.
Kalau kisah, jangan fikir lebih.
Kalau kisah, jangan pendam.
Kalau kisah, luah.
Kalau kisah, jangan tunggu.

Tapi kalau tak kisah, blah.
Tapi kalau tak lagi kisah, cabut.
Tapi kalau memang tak patut kisah, lari.

Lari sebelum manusia jatuh hati.

Lari sebelum curi hati.

Lari sebelum makin lama tergantung harapan palsu yang kau tunjuk selama ini.

Antara menjaga hati, greedy ataupun selfish aku pun tak pasti.

Yang penting, dulu aku ikhlas menemani.

Mini goals.

To do more.
To hope less.
To learn more.
To expect less.
To care less @ unnecessary people.
To care more @ my family, close friends and nice people.
To just be myself.

To not worry.
To just do my best.

Right people would notice.
Wrong people would condemn.
But it is okay.

:)

Misi 2020

Happy new year, dear self.

Before that I would like to say thank you for those yang kekal disisi.
And also for those yang pergi, thank you juga.

2019 is was like a roller coaster year for me.
So many ups, so many downs.

The thing that I'm sure that I met new people in life and I left certain people in life.
I have no regrets for knowing new people and I have no regrets for leaving some people.

Secara umumnya saya mahu:

1. Meniaga semula
2. Kurangkan berasap
3. Banyakkan masa untuk insan insan yang terpilih
4. Menyimpan secara konsisten
5. Ease things for the parents.

Secara umurnya lagi, saya juga mahu tekankan self care dalam diri untuk tahun ni.

I honestly don't care much about myself previously hence I'm doing it right now.

Also, self esteem. I wanna just "fuck it" instead of  "what if", yknow? If you know, you know.

Anyway.. I colored my hair!! 

One of the thing that I wanna do before I turn 30..

Putrajaya, 1st day of 2020.

This year would actually be a tough year for me.

But let's just try to cope with it and live, shall we?

Dear 26 years old me, from the 24 years old me.

Hello the 26 years old me.

Happy new year.
Happy new year of 2020, in advance from the 2018 me.

At this point I'm not sure what's the life progress nanti.
At this point I'm not sure what's my opinion in every perspective of life..

But the thing I'm sure is;
We used to think that our life sucks.
We almost gave up.
However things turned just fine, sebab apa?
Sebab sentiasa cuba bertahan.

Setelah mengharungi 2017 yang gila nak mampus, we got promoted.
The big boss said that it's a well deserved promotion.

Kalau aku yang berumur 26 tahun nanti ni dalam keadaan down -- bangkit lah.
Kalau aku yang berumur 26 tahun nanti ni dalam keadaan static -- good lah.

Sunway Lagoon, 2018.