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26 Jun 2016

Semester dua.


Dengan konfidennya aku berkata bahawa hari Ahad esok kelas pertama aku start.
Tanpa aku tahu (ataupun buat buat tak tahu ehe) bahawa aku baru je terlepas kelas pertama aku yang bermula pada hari Sabtu.

Entah.

Semester pertama, pun dah semput.
Semester kedua ni, harapnya sempurna.

Harapnya lah. Takut pula semester ini jadi sembang.

Oh, harini aku join volunteering lagi. 
Yang aku pasti, social anxiety ini tak seteruk dulu.

People aren't that bad..when you don't take them seriously. Hah!

Back to school, on every weekend!
Take a good care of yourself, ya. 
Kata gua, pada cermin. 


21 Jun 2016

What about you?


He's happy.

She's happy.

They're happy.

And what about you? 
Judging them like a saint,
while you sin too? 
mock them like you're perfect,
talk shit about them like you're right all the time. 
Are you satisfied with this?
Are you happy with it?
Do you feel fulfilled by doing this?
You can always advise, but public shaming isn't the tool.
You can always warn, but being derisive isn't the way.
                                                                   Sincerely,
                                                                   Alia Mustapha.

20 Jun 2016

Terima kasih 3.0


"Bongok lah awak ni."
"Awak lagi bongok." 
"Saya sayang awak."
"Terima kasih."
"Eeeeish, cepat la cakap sayang saya balik!"
"Sayang saya balik?"
"Eiii! Benci la awak ni." 

Dalam satu hari, kita boleh gaduh benda bodoh.
Dalam satu hari, kita selalu merindu.
Dalam satu hari, kita boleh ketawa sama dari jauh.
Dalam satu hari, kita selalu borak kosong.
Dalam satu hari, kita boleh sedih sendiri.
Dalam satu hari, kita selalu senyum sama.
Dalam satu hari, kau sentiasa ada.
Tak pernah lagi kau takda. 
Jauh ataupun dekat,
busy mahupun free. 

Maka dengan itu, 
terima kasih untuk itu.


13 Jun 2016

Birthday?



So today yesterday is was my birthday.

My family celebrated it a day before. Lovely.
My small circle of friends wished me, through voicenotes & videos & words. Not to lie, I smiled.
Someone I'm with sang the birthday song on the phone. Not to lie, it's cute.
And a few people wished me too. Awesome.

So here's a life update:
For now, I don't feel that happy.
For now, I feel null as heck.
For now, I'm making someone feel useless because I'm not happy.

The thing is it's not you love, it's me.

I'm getting old.
I'm feeling so adult-ish.
It's just a plain day but with some "shit I'm 22 screw this nobody is around and I'm scared of the future" feeling.

Yes.
Bye for now.

Latest update:
Last night my favorite person came just to see me on my birthday.
That would be enough.

It's just the presence of someone can change everything, especially the one you hope the most.
You don't have to give gift cause you're the gift to me.
And and and.. I'm sorry for being cocky.

Take care!



10 Jun 2016

Dia & Orang Ketiga.


Dia janji untuk setia, tapi betulkah?
Dalam diam hati dah mati. 
Dia janji untuk ada, tapi betulkah?
Terang-terang takda bukti. 
Dan orang ketiga,
tak pernah janji untuk setia tapi sentiasa disisi. 
Dan orang ketiga,
tak pernah janji untuk ada tapi sentiasa cuba menemani. 
Dan dia,
pernah jadi seperti orang ketiga. 
Dan orang ketiga,
mungkin nanti bakal jadi dia. 
Jangan pernah mengharap.